Are you a teenage male who mistakenly believes he has musical talent, and irritates the hell out of everyone around him? Do you drum at dinner with your knives and forks? Are you a wizz on air guitar? Then this is for you…
Korg Kaossilator
Isn’t it lovely? The new Korg Kaossilator is a portable, battery-driven thingey which comes with 100 music programmes, 31 scale patterns and an unbelievable 50 gate arpeggiators, whatever they are. It’s got a loop facility that will let you play the same five-second sound pattern over and over and over until your parents leave home and the neighbours buy a Kalishnikov.
It will produce what you think is music at the drop of a hoodie, to let you be twice as annoying as before. Oh – and it also comes in pink, but who wants it in a girlie colour like that? No thanks!
We’d tell you more but you wouldn’t understand it. And anyway, you’re drooling already, right? You’ve gotta have it. So start nagging your parents NOW, and keep on until they give in, just to shut you up. It’s only £119.00 for God’s sake — worth every penny to set the next pop sensation on the road to fame.
If you can actually read , you can find out more here, or if you can’t, watch the video here.
Wish your parents Happy Christmas from us.
took your avice… gonna be a star!!!!!
Comment by strep73 — November 12, 2009 @ 11:35 am
Of course, once we’ve boosted their self-esteem by making them think they’re rock stars, it will be all-the-more fun to bring them crashing back down to reality by giving them a Pimple Detector:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18211603?itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum&ordinalpos=6
Comment by Deb Amlen — November 13, 2009 @ 2:10 pm
Thanks Deb.. the Pimple Detector comes a few decades too late for me, but I approve of bringing teenagers crashing to earth — serve them right for being younger!
Comment by lenko — November 13, 2009 @ 6:27 pm