A Jaundiced Eye
The Daily Moaner has often been accused of looking at everything with a jaundiced eye. Your editor pleads guilty but enraged. But now you — yes you ! — can view everything in the same pleasing shade of yellow. Quite fetching, isn’t it? And definately convincing for a few days off work.
Selene Lens
For now a company in America (of course) has a great range of special effects contact lenses, mainly for Hollywood, but hey — why not you? And it’s not just jaundice… you can choose all kinds of eye trauma… or how about vampire eyes, or goats eyes?
Darth Maul lens
Personally, your editor goes for the Darth Maul lenses, cheap at only $100 per lens. Think of the entrance you could make at a party.
And surely, there has to be a woman somewhere who’d go for a guy like that?