In common with most businesses, the Daily Moaner has been feeling the pinch. Rising costs have been only partially off-set by Grizelda’s small cleaning job, and she refuses to go on the game. So your editor has taken on a second paper round. Even that is not enough.
Whichever party wins the forthcoming election, there is sure to be an increase in the cost of living, and with the rumoured “death tax”, also an increase in the cost of dying. Given that output has sharply reduced of late, owing to painting the fence, the Daily Moaner is therefore facing a dwindling money supply. Up until today, the deficit has been financed by higher and higher borrowings, with total indebtedness estimated to be 104% of GDP. After a long and losing battle, we have lost our AAA credit rating.
Loadsa Money!
Are we down-hearted? Well yes, actually, we are pretty much. But good news is on the horizon. Following the lead of the Labour Government and its never-known-to-be-wrong leader James Gordon Brown, we shall be solving our crisis by a technique known as Quantitative Easing. Or printing money. Even now, our photocopier printing presses are busy churning out new twenty pound notes.
It’s not illegal. Honest, officer…